In the Spirit: Christmas Novena

As Catholics (and Christians) we believe that Advent is a time for "preparing the way of the Lord" into our hearts and lives in a profound and personal way as we anticipate the Nativity of the Incarnate Lord.  [Wow!  That's way cooler than just anticipating a fat guy in carmine fuzz with cookie crumbs stuck in his beard trying to shimmy up and down our chimneys.]

My sophomore lit teacher in high school (thanks Mr. Westhoff!) introduced me to the St. Andrew's Christmas Novena (which is neither a true novena--9 day prayer--nor a prayer to St. Andrew).  At first I was skeptical.  Seriously?  Why do we say it 15 times??  I think God gets the point.  Plus, it probably wasn't "piercing cold" when Christ was born that close to the equator.  [Yes, I was an internally arrogant teen.]

Then, it began to click.  I have to say it 15 times because the first 10 times I'm not even focused on the prayer.  It takes that long for me to really, honestly re-focus on Christ and the mystery of Christmas.  Also, the language of the prayer is beautiful.  It doesn't matter what temperature it was--he was born amidst difficulty and a world full of icy hearts (like mine).

This prayer (of which I cannot find the origins, much to my dismay), is traditionally (for the last hundred years) said from the feast of St. Andrew (Nov. 30th--today) until Christmas Eve.  It is piously believed to be efficacious in obtaining an answer to your request, in addition to being a powerful way of focusing your heart on Christmas.

Say it 15 times a day (5 times before each meal if you need to break it up) for a particular intention.  Just take the time to memorize it the first day or two so you can say it whenever you remember.  Now, I look forward to this devotion every year and share it with my students.

Christmas Novena

Hail, and blessed be the hour and moment at which the Son of God was born of the most pure Virgin Mary at midnight in Bethlehem in the piercing cold. At that hour vouchsafe, I beseech Thee, to hear my prayers and grant my desires. (Mention your intentions here) Through the merits of Jesus Christ and His most Blessed Mother. Amen.
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The Preservation of You

In my class on Utopian & Dystopian Fiction, we brought up an interesting question today:

Does a society have an obligation to preserve (or at least respect) individual contribution, impact, or memory?

The Time Traveler in H. G. Wells' The Time Machine returns from his trip to a future full of degraded human being with little or no rationality and a total disregard for past triumphs of mankind.  He questions whether the writings he slaves over and the inventions he labors to create can ever have a true impact.  He nearly despairs that life (as the Spanish dramatist would propose) is a dream after all and that the works of man are futile and ephemeral in the final analysis.

In Orwell's 1984, the society under Big Brother not only accepts the decay of individual memory through time, they systematically erase individual, historical impact of those who are eliminated from society.  The main character's job is to rewrite news articles to eliminate the names and rebellious actions of those who have been killed.  As he does so, he suppresses feelings of guilt by arguing that he doesn't even know if the article being changed was true in the first place.  Replacing one lie with another is not a violation of integrity.

Many poets sought to preserve themselves and others through their art, seeking a more permanent memorial than a name written fancifully in the sand.  However, as Ephesians reminds us, that too will pass.

The concept of memory also reminds me of a wonderful Elie Wisel speech on that topic.  In it he proposes:
Without memory, our existence would be barren and opaque, like a prison cell into which no light penetrates; like a tomb which rejects the living. . . . it is memory that will save humanity. For me, hope without memory is like memory without hope.

Just as man cannot live without dreams, he cannot live without hope. If dreams reflect the past, hope summons the future. Does this mean that our future can be built on a rejection of the past? Surely such a choice is not necessary. The two are incompatible. The opposite of the past is not the future but the absence of future; the opposite of the future is not the past but the absence of past. The loss of one is equivalent to the sacrifice of the other.

This returns us to the question at hand.  What is our responsibility to those who have gone on before us?  Must we remember?  Must we preserve their impact?  Must we protect the memory of individuals or only of the great men and the larger movements of social change?  Should only the memory of the good be treasured or also the foreboding presence of past evils?  Is memory the responsibility of each man, each culture, each country or no one at all?

Thoughts?

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A Hundred Yesterdays Ago

I feel as though I've been time traveling.

First of all, I've been attempting to read (or at least skim) my whole elective curriculum this week.  [1 full book and 3 half books down!]  My elective next semester is a college prep. (read "college freshman level") class on Utopian & Distopian Fiction (people making up societies that are either seriously wishful thinking or satirical).  Thus, Brave New World, The Time Machine, 1984, and More's Utopia have been on my mind.  AND my husband and I watched a post-apocalyptic sort of movie called The Road . . . which I will never watch again.

Aside from imaginatively traveling into the future, I feel that my hobbies are taking me back into the past.

This week we've been harvesting from our little garden.  It's been doing ok, but not great.  I can't imagine living in a place (or time) when I didn't have the option to run to the grocery to pick up extras of whatever didn't grow well in my garden.

Then, in the interest of maintaining our health, being financially smart, and preserving the "women's culinary culture" very much lost in our society, I've been making lots more food from scratch this summer.  Finding uses for fresh produce like cucumber salad or a layered tex-mex dip is delicious and fun.  I also made a pie crust from scratch for the first time in years and discovered it to not be nearly as hard as I imagined.

I've also attempted to make scones from freshly ground flour.  This is MUCH better for you than store-bought flour or bread/wheat products.  However, getting used to the rougher cut grain is tricky.  The scones were a bit "nuttier" in flavor, courser in texture, and heavier in crumb than I'm used to.  I added blueberries because they make everything taste delicious.  I'm still going to have to work on this one . . . and I'm not even grounding the flour myself!

Lastly, I went shooting with my hubby for a date today.  I think learning how to shoot his larger "home defense size" hand gun will be a good remedy to whisk away vulnerability dreams stemming from that horror movie I watched with him. [Do other moms get those too??]  I wish I had a picture.  I really enjoyed myself and appreciated my husband's patience with my many questions as I sought to improve my accuracy.  It was not my first time handling a gun, but a deeper knowledge of firearms gives me an increased respect for the power of a gun and for the healthy enjoyment sportsmen gain from them.  It also makes me feel like one of those women during the American Westward Expansion--they knew how to use a firearm.  That was about as normal as using a shovel back then.  It's only this polished urban mumbo-jumbo from the media that makes us think that guns are mysteriously dangerous on their own.  Those women of the past would probably agree with the snarky bumper stickers that read: "Gun control is hitting your target."

I like pursuing hobbies that connect me to things people have been doing for hundreds or even thousands of years--things that were done a hundred yesterdays ago and then again today.  New things (like blogging) are nice, but they don't have the depth, value, or aurora of timelessness that these older arts have.

Top image source: http://media.photobucket.com/image/time%20machine/MBLOOM777/ALPHABET%2520SOUP/the_time_machine_large_01.jpg

My Twirling Mind: Googoo, Gaga, & Gye

When we think of a mom multitasking, we often picture her talking on the phone, catching the cabinet door before it smashes an inquisitive baby's fingers, and washing the dishes . . . simultaneously.  [Oh wait, that wasn't a stereotype, that was me about 3 minutes ago.]  However, a mother must multitask not only physically but also mentally.  I'm going to qualify how this happens in my life through 3 nonsense words: Googoo, Gaga, & Gye.

GooGoo
This is my "mom-brain" mode.  I speak gibberish with my son and he responds in kind.  I ask him about his little life in my higher-pitched "talking to something small and cute voice".  Sometimes, it's easier to talk to my husband (or about my husband) in the same tone, just to avoid switching too much.  "James!  Does Jameser's like avocado for dinner? Mmmmmm!  How about Dada?  Does Dada want beer with dinner tonight?  Yay for beer after long days at work!"  Ahem.  I mean, "Hun, do want a beer or iced tea?"
Sometimes after a long day in "mommy mode", it's difficult to switch out.  It's especially hard to interpolate intellectual or spiritual reading into my schedule.  "James, can you play nicely with your blocks while Mommy tries to learn Middle English?  Yay blocks!"  Yes, I am that crazy.

Gaga
As in Lady Gaga.  I know very little about her . . . I like it that way.  However, I teach teens and I live in the world.  Thus, it is prudent and useful for me to know something about what's going on beyond the front doors of my house or the school.  Being connected to current issues and events also helps me to discuss something "adult" but not work-related with my husband over dinner.  I also think it is crucial to be an informed voter in a society that's moral standing is tenuous at best.

Yet, I must be careful of two things: first, that my time online or listening to talk radio does not absorb an inordinate amount of time, and secondly, that I do not lose my virtue of hope or charity as I listen to the disheartening fusillade of attacks on human dignity, modesty, discretion, peace, truth, etc. that make up the majority of "news".

Thus, this secondary form of "mental multitasking" is the attempt to live in this world, as I am called to do as an adult, Christian citizen.

Gye
Gye is not really a nonsense word; it just sounds like one to the modern audience.  It is actually the Middle English verb for "to guide".  Since I'm currently studying that form of English, this term will suffice to represent for me my call both to seek guidance in my life and to be a guide to others, especially to my child.  Therefore, the tertiary mental mode that I must attempt to develop is that of an intellectual and spiritual person.

Depending on one's natural aptitude for such things, the "intellectual life" of several mothers could all look rather different.  I think what's important is that we seek some adult conversation and reading to incorporate into our lives that helps us to learn how to be a better person.  I've read that the best way for a dad to be a good father is for him to love his wife unconditionally.  This points towards a truth that applies to mothers as well.  When I myself am a good person (or at least am striving to be saintly), I am serving my children.  Parents are the primary educators of their children.  As such, we must be actively thinking people, not passive receptors of advice, news, cultural trends, and modes of behavior.  Our children need to see integrity and discernment practiced by their parents.

Our intellectual lives are intimately linked with our spiritual lives; our intellect is an active principle of our souls.  [Please, don't rake me over the coals for the philosophical inexactitude of that statement.]  Our intellect should (ideally) govern our wills, and it is in our chosen activities that we live out our moral lives.

For example, I read a great book like The Hidden Power of Kindness for a few minutes before bed.  I reflect on what I have read and apply it to myself and realize that I have not been as considerate of others as I could be by failing to be on time.  The next day, remembering the previous reflection, even though my passions say, "Sleep in late.  Take it easy this morning.  Rushing around won't help you start the day on a good foot," I know that I need to be on time for an appointment.  My intellectual knowledge of the good helps me reorient my will to chose the best action, and I stumble toward the shower.

This last area of mental development calls us to a life beyond the pressing needs of the moment.  This is the "not of the world" component of the Christian life that focuses us on our eternal purpose and on the deeper significance of our sometimes mundane tasks.  Taking time to reorient our lives according to a truth beyond ourselves helps us to live for others and to live for God; this mental practice enriches our lives.

The Catch
A person a peace is not divided and is not artificial.  How do I switch between mom with son, wife with spouse, and teacher with students modes and yet stay at peace?  How do I gracefully live life as a loving woman who lives in but not of this world?

I've heard it takes a lot of practice and patience to be able successfully to juggle three balls.  I have not yet tried juggling for more than about 15 minutes.  Juggling these three mental modes can be challenging.  The pursuit of wisdom is not a task for the faint of heart.  I certainly don't have it figured out yet; I am continually realizing that I am neglecting one or two of the above mental modes.  Occasionally, I feel that I'm failing at all three [when I'm in "zombie overload mode" and just want a glass of wine and a stupid chick flick.]  However, I know that it's a worthy pursuit.

Proverbs 14:1
The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.

I want to build up my husband and children and friends.  I want to create a home that will be a safe haven of virtue and peace and a thriving source of life and love.  If Wisdom will help me to accomplish those goals, then God help me to seek her.

James 1:5
If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

What do you do to balance and develop these "mental modes" in your life?


Image:http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3451/3900229689_f95d1fed37.jpg

Honor Your Father . . .

A happy and blessed Father's Day to all of the dads out there!

I think few people truly appreciate the importance of the father's role in a family and in the development of his children.  Just look at all of the cards out there for this holiday.  They all have neckties, jokes about being dumb (thanks you sitcoms of America for that stereotype), half-hearted apologies for being a jerk, or pictures of grills, golf, and beer.  Maybe I've just been extraordinarily blessed to be around men who have deserved much more thanks than a creased piece of paper with "Thanks for bein' my old man" scrawled across the front.

Men who truly become servant leaders within their families and communities have an extraordinarily positive impact on the lives around them.  They uplift women beyond their insecurities to be beautiful and strong and capable of great self-sacrifice; a woman will do anything for a man she profoundly respects.  Good men challenge the other men and boys around them to guard that which is valuable, sacred, and fragile and to provide a good home, a safe community, and a culture of justice and integrity for others.

Three dads in my life have helped me to become the woman I am today.

I barely remember a time when my dad only worked one job.  Providing for his family has always been a top priority for him, and he would rather put in long hours at work and on the road than to see any of his daughters lack something they needed.  He made a point of picking out individual gifts for us for Christmas and sometimes cards for Valentine's Day.  His relationship with each daughter was different and important to him.  When I have come home on vacations from school, missionary activity, or life as a teacher/mother/wife, he invites me on a lunch date to catch up.  That investment in quality time, despite his busy schedule, was always precious to me.  He also taught me to follow my dreams and make time for passions that make me come alive, even if it doesn't always seem practical.  He is a gifted tenor and not only has made his passion into a side-business, but has also done benefit concerts for various organizations and Churches.  His daughters are not alone in looking up to him as a generous and good-hearted man.

As a married woman, I have been blessed with a new father-in-law.  Not every daughter-in-law truly feels that she is not just "my son's wife" but is also "my daughter" in the way my father-in-law has welcomed me into his family.  It's a good thing we get along, because he also happens to be my boss at work.  :)  Seeing him both at home and at work, I have deep respect for the integrity and humility with which he leads his daily life.  Family is always his top priority, but he also has a heart for serving the community, especially through character-forming education.  When he has difficult decisions to make, I often see him stop mid-stream, go to the chapel for 5 minutes of reflection, and then come back to the task at hand with a clearer perspective on the issue.  I can easily see where my husband has learned some of his many virtues.

Lastly, my husband is not only a loving spouse but also a dedicated father to our 8 month old son.  I remember reading books that advised tired mothers not to "dump" the baby on dad the second he comes home from work.  I've never had to worry about that--my husband sweeps James into the air and goofs off with him the minute he steps in the door.  Some people have joked that my husband "has to be Mr. Mom" on Mondays when he watches our son while I'm at work.  My response is that I love to see how his relationship with James is totally different from mine.  Rather than trying to replace or mirror me in his interactions with James, my husband is already forming him into a "guy" and a man through games, "man to man chats", and ways of bonding that would never even occur to me.  I could not imagine a boy whose father could possibly love him more.  Seeing the two of them play together (and seeing the way my husband pitches in when James is not so happy too) brings more joy to my life than I can express.

Make sure your dad knows today how much you value and respect him.  It's not easy to "love your wife as Christ loved the Church" and "train up a child in the way he should go so that when he is old he will not depart from it."  May God bless our fathers richly for the blessing they have been to each of us!  St. Joseph, pray for all fathers.

Truly Open-minded

Our society has a problem (ok, so it has several problems, but we'll just focus on one today) . . .
It dubs one with the honorable title "Open-minded" when you are empty-headed and receptive to their ideas and close-minded to anyone else's ideas.

Example:
I am open-minded if I think that we need to financially back new technologies to save our endangered planet (no matter how tenuous and unsupported and ineffective those technologies and the global warming hypothesis may be.)
I am close-minded if I think that our public school system is a proven failure in comparison to our own standards and international standards of excellence and should be replaced with completely different models of teaching and curriculum based on a core group of texts and subjects, traditional ethics, stronger discipline, and critical thinking development.

Close-mindedness has come to be the label branded on any independent and/or traditional thinker.  Our government (and the educators who enjoy their symbiotic relationship with Big Brother) has increasingly taken the line that "we'll handle all of those governmental complexities; just trust us; we'll take care of you."  Has anyone else read 1984 or Brave New World?  If you have, those phrases are hauntingly familiar and ominous.

Creativity is only encouraged along party lines.  New ways to intrude on personal privacy, to normalize perverted forms of fornication, and to bring more aspects of daily life under government control are all welcome here!  Research on the effects of contraceptive hormones on the environment, the true magnitude of post-abortion syndrome and abortion malpractice, and the effects of divorce and infidelity on children's character formation . . . honestly, that's all rather negative and unimportant.  Or so I'm told.

A truly open-minded person is not susceptible to propaganda and band wagon appeals.  As Chesterton illustrates vividly, "The object of opening the mind, as of opening the mouth, is to shut it again on something solid."  Dr. Suess would agree:
     My uncle ordered popovers
      from the restaurant's bill of fare.
      And, when they were served,
      he regarded them with a penetrating stare.
      Then he spoke great words of wisdom
      as he sat there on that chair:
      "To eat these things," said my uncle,
      "You must exercise great care.
      You may swallow down what's solid,
      but you must spit out the air!"
     And as you partake of the world's bill of fare,
      that's darned good advice to follow.
      Do a lot of spitting out the hot air.
      And be careful what you swallow.
      ~Theodore Seuss Geisel (Dr. Seuss), from a commencement address

One who deserves the title "open-minded" in the sense of a virtue is one who has the humility to admit they may be wrong, the strength of character to change when they find a deeper truth to adhere to, and the confidence to close their mind against temptations to dishonesty, sophistry, fallacious thinking, and the influence of weaker characters.

I've always liked to think that I'm the type of person who has been unafraid to fight the current.  However, I too have moments when I compare my body to the girl on the magazine in the grocery store aisle; I want to just smile and nod instead of redirecting a conversation that has taken a wrong turn into the realm of gossip or illogical argumentation; I want to think that "I know better" than the generations that go before me just because some of my skills or fluidity with technology is better; I want to just be told what to think and to do, rather than to research, to seek for truth, and to change myself when I find my virtue is weak and my logic unsound.

Some thoughts to consider:

> If you don't control your mind, someone else will.  ~John Allston

> Be open-minded, but not so open-minded that your brains fall out.  ~Stephen A. Kallis, Jr.

> Custom will reconcile people to any atrocity; and fashion will drive them to acquire any custom.  ~George Bernard Shaw

> Finding the occasional straw of truth awash in a great ocean of confusion and bamboozle requires intelligence, vigilance, dedication and courage.  But if we don't practice these tough habits of thought, we cannot hope to solve the truly serious problems that face us - and we risk becoming a nation of suckers, up for grabs by the next charlatan who comes along.  ~Carl Sagan, The Fine Art of Baloney Detection

> “...when faith resolves to believe it runs the risk of committing itself to an error, but it nevertheless believes. There is no other road to faith; if one wishes to escape risk, it is as if one wanted to know with certainty that he can swim before going into the water.” ~Kierkegaard 

Image: http://www.fernandobaril.com.br/imagens/open_mind.jpg

Was it sufficiently creepy to get you to read my overly-long post?

Wisdom of Children

A father wanted to read a magazine but was being bothered by his little girl, Shelby.  She wanted to know what the United States looked like. Finally, he tore a sheet out of his new magazine on which was printed the map of the country. Tearing it into small pieces, he gave it to Shelby and said, "Go into the other room and see if you can put this together. This will show you our whole country today."

After a few minutes, Shelby returned and handed him the map, correctly fitted and taped together. The father was surprised and asked how she had finished so quickly.

"Oh," she said, "on the other side of the paper is a picture of Jesus. When I got all of Jesus back where He belonged, then our country just came together."

Not a bad idea . . .  

Image: http://www.piperreport.com/archives/Images/Puzzle%20of%20State%20Health%20Reforms.jpg

What Makes Today Special?

Part of what reveals and forms a culture is the holidays that are celebrated.  If we are truly striving to create a Catholic culture in our families and society, we should endeavor to make the feast days of the church "special" days in our homes.

A family friend inspired me to reflect the celebrations of the Church through meals on feast days and solemnities.  She often will make a meal that is traditionally tied to a particular saint (like bread on the Solemnity of St. Joseph) or that saint's country (like Irish food on St. Patrick's Day).  I decided to start this year on the Feast of the Presentation with at least putting a little more effort (though no symbolism) into dinner to celebrate!  [see pic :) ]

Rites of Passage

Yesterday, I was speaking with my sister & mother-in-law about birth order and the importance of "milestones" as you grow up.  By milestones, I do not mean just "big years" like 16, 18, and 21--important because of state-mandated minimum ages for driving, smoking, voting, and drinking alcohol.  Rather, we spoke of individual rites of passage within the family: when the girls could wear make-up or go on a date, when the boys could shoot a gun or go on a special trip with dad, and when each child could begin to have a later bedtime.

It occurred to me that, in our "everyone is perfectly equal, non-discriminatory" culture, siblings (and only children) are not told to wait for much of anything.  Why should Susie get to go to sleep over at a friends' house when Mary can't just because Susie is two years older?  "That's not fair!" cry younger siblings and equal-opportunists everywhere.  But perhaps it's not only fair (with maturity comes greater trust and responsibility), but necessary.

I would propose that children who are not given milestones or "rites of passage" to look forward to within the family will seek out their own "big firsts" outside of the family.  Instead of understanding a gradation of privileges as they approach adulthood, they only see two options.  Either they are children who can do practically anything and get almost anything OR they are adults who always can do what they want and get what they want.  This dynamic may exist for spoiled children who are placated by their guilt-ridden working parents, and it may also be a warped mentality in a family that just failed to properly distinguish between the maturity levels of the children.  The result is that the children, seeking to be "adult," look for adult activities and pleasures.  Too too often this leads to early experimentation in sexually-focused relationships as well as a curiosity in drugs and alcohol.  They will look for something that is forbidden now but will mark an entrance into a more adult world when they achieve their goal.

Rites of passage are a richly cultural part of life.  Our Roman Catholic culture and tradition offers a gradation of Sacraments (especially within the Rites of Initiation) that are intended to reflect and augment the spiritual maturity of the individual.  Many successful organizations have employed the same technique (the scouts come to mind.)  Each family is called to be a domestic church and also a building block within the larger community.  Thus, each family should have, to some extent, their own culture, complete with these rites of passage and age or maturity based privileges and gifts.

Ideas:
*In my dad's large family when ge grew up, you had to be a certain age before you received your own bike.
*My sisters and I each eagerly anticipated our 12 year old weekend trip with mom (where we learned about the birds and the bees and received a beautiful chastity ring).
* My cousins and I each had special trips that we went on with our grandparents at ages 7, 10, & 12.  We would go to an historical/educational location like Colonial Williamsburg or Lancaster County, PA.
*We had certain ages in my family for when we could wear make-up, get our ears pierced, date, sleep-over, stay up later, start practicing driving, etc.

Please share your own ideas and traditions.  As I start my family, this is something I'd love to have in mind (both through delayed privileges and through unique experiences).

Being All Things To All Men

I remember struggling with that line from St. Paul (1 Cor 9:22) as I began my mission work with FOCUS several years ago.  How can one be "all things to all men" and still be authentically yourself?  There are some things I will just never be able to be or pretend to be--like an avid sports fan or video game addict.  The thing I initially struggled with most was relating to the language of the "typical" college student.  At Christendom, I had become used to a high level of common vocabulary filled with theological, philosophical, historical, and literary allusions and humor.  Then, God placed me in a beach town with kids who spoke mostly about tv, current movies, modern music, celebrity news, clothes, and coffee.  I couldn't relate.  With prayer, a slice or five of humble pie, and a "studied" attention to modern lingo (I'm a nerd), I developed my own way of speaking to modern culture.  Often, this required me to use casual analogies comparing spiritual realities with the material world, to not "shy away" from words like "sex" and "masturbation," and to re-word Biblical stories to reflect the language my students were used to hearing (apart from vulgarities).  My new rhetorical approach "worked"--I had people's attention and didn't feel intellectually arrogant.  However, I soon noticed a problem.

Shallow language can only communicate shallow ideas.  [Shallow language = that which is fully made up of vulgarities or the word "like" used in all grammatical positions or goofy chatter about materialistic concerns]  This is not to say, however, that only eloquent intellectuals can communicate about lofty theological principles.  Simple language can communicate truths--and deep truths at that.  I began to feel that intermixing too much "shallow" talk with a Christian message seemed to cheapen that which was communicated.  It was like trying to improve on a diamond's beauty by surrounding it with a setting of plastic gemstones.  I noticed a shift in my language and manner of communication after this minor epiphany, but I could never quite figure out why it rubbed to call "sex" by that common name, etc.

Dr. Alice von Hildebrand recently helped me to understand this discomfort I had been feeling.  She spoke of the importance of using exact and beautiful language when discussing sacred things.  Dr. von Hildebrand said that she is shocked to hear God referred to as "the big man upstairs" as if the God of the Universe is Joe from next door.  She emphatically stated that casual terminology like this is a reflection of the general loss of reverence for the sacred and the loss of respect for authority that we have in our everything-should-be-a-democracy culture.  I hope I never made this big of a blunder in my attempts at analogies, but she also mentioned the scandal that can result from attempts to "connect" to a modern audience with phrases like: John Paul II completed the sexual revolution begun by Hugh Hefner (actual phrase from a well-known apologist).  Some elements of modern culture are so "filthy" [I agree with her terminology regarding porn.] that they should not ever be related to anything beautiful and true in the spiritual realm.  She also applied this importance of reverent language to what she consistently calls the "intimate sphere."  Dr. von Hildebrand clarified, "Animals copulate but humans procreate.  Animals have sex but humans have the martial embrace."  We are not most like the animals in our reproductive abilities; we are most unlike the animals in this realm.  They merely reproduce, while we have a mutual affirmation of persons in a loving embrace that has the potential to be uniquely touched by God when the fruit of that love is blessed with a newly created soul.  Wow . . .

So, how then are we to "be all things to all men" and connect to a spiritually disconnected and apathetic culture?  Dr. von Hildebrand reminisced that her husband, Dietrich, often spoke of the "apostolate of being."  When you are not in a position to witness to someone effectively with your words, you witness to them with your life.  Eventually, if you are living a truly, authentic Christian life, they will see that you have peace and joy in the face of every blessing and obstacle in life.  Their curiosity will open doors for conversations that may not have been possible otherwise.  Then, when the opportunity arises, speak of He Whom you know and love, and speak of Him with reverence and with the beautiful language that ought to accompany profound truths.

Reflecting on her words, I think I understand that verse much better now.  One is authentically "all things" to others by being humble enough to empathize with them and exercise true charity.  It is by serving them in love that you gain a hearing for the Good News of Him who loved all and served those whom He led.  God doesn't need a gimmicky marketing department for his work upon earth.  He just needs authentic lovers to speak of Him and to teach others to love.  It is by responding to the cry of those who share our common human desire (a longing for love and truth) in humility and reverence for God and His creation that we can best be apostles like Paul.

Advent Aspirations

Try to step away from the commercial Christmas that began a week before Thanksgiving.  Ignore the hypnotic, strobe-style led lights and sale signs for two seconds . . . or four weeks.  Tomorrow begins Advent.  This is one of my favorite liturgical seasons.  It gives me a chance to reflect on the past year, make a resolution for how I will prepare my heart and mind for Christ's coming, and enjoy the time with friends and family that reflects the hospitality we wish to extend to the Christ Child.  How will you prepare for the real Christmas Season--the one that starts on December 25th?  Here are some things I have done on my own or with my family in the past:

*Make an Advent resolution (after all this is the liturgical New Year).  Decide on one thing to add to your daily routine to make Christ more concretely the center of your daily life.  This Advent, I'm going to return to 15-20 min. of daily spiritual reading.  I know that I'll have time to do it while nursing, so it's a manageable goal for me right now.

*Decorate a Jesse tree.  Make ornaments that reflect Biblical stories of the Old Testement that pre-figured the coming of Christ and/or involved his ancestors (from the line of Jesse).

*Go to an Advent penance service (or just normal confession hours).  As John the Baptist exhorted his followers, we must prepare the way of the Lord with a renunciation of sin.

*Listen to a performance or CD of Handel's "Messiah."  This was something my mom always did.  My friend and I continued the tradition by going to the Messiah sing-a-long at the Kennedy Center one year.  This piece of music is a beautiful, Scriptural reflection on the Incarnation and life of Christ.

*Set up your nativity set WITHOUT baby Jesus (he gets to arrive on Christmas).

*Make a "manger" for baby Jesus.  This can be any box or basket.  Put a pile of straw (or yellow felt strips) next to it.  Tell the family members that each time they do something to take initiative or to make a sacrifice (give up eating that piece of candy, doing dishes without complaining, cleaning up their room, etc.) they get to put one piece of straw in the crib for baby Jesus.  The goal is to make a soft bed for His arrival on Christmas.  Meanwhile, everyone is preparing their hearts for Him.  Wrap a baby doll in a blanket to be Baby Jesus and place him in the manger on Christmas.

*Light an Advent wreath each Sunday at dinner or daily with family night prayers.  My family would do this and sing an Advent song like "Come, O' Come Emmanuel."

*Celebrate the feast of Saint Nicholas on Dec. 6th.  It's a great opportunity to focus on gift-giving as an expression of generosity and care of those who are less fortunate.

*Pick a person off of the "angel-tree" or whatever your church community calls it.  Help someone who is less fortunate than you.

*Look up the Christian symbolism behind Christmas trees, candy-canes, evergreens, stars, etc.

*Use an Advent Calendar to count down the days.  I love the ones with Scripture verses written in them.

*Say the Christmas Novena--one of the most beautiful, simple prayers I've learned.  You say it 15 times each day from the feast of St. Andrew (Nov. 30th) until Christmas.  I used to think that was silly.  Now, I realize that (1) it shows my fervor for the intention of my novena and (2) by the 12th time I'm saying it or so I've stopped thinking about what we're going to buy Uncle Dan, how to make that fruit cake I had the other night, and when I need to put in the next load of laundry--NOW I'm focused on the words I'm saying.

Anyone have any other ideas or great family Advent traditions?

What is Progress?

I have to admit, every time I think I understand progress, the great rallying-call and force that moves society, I suddenly encounter a small thing, a very small thing that perhaps only I see, and it reminds me that progress after all is found in simple authenticity.

I used to think that the most important parts of the pro-life movement were vast campaigns, protests, and vocal lobbying groups. Now that I'm pregnant I see it very differently. The most effective force for spreading the gospel of life is parents that adore their children. My love for my hidden little one, my excitement bubbling over onto posters about prenatal development for my classroom, and my joyful conversations about pregnancy with my students has done more to spread the pro-life message in a poignant and personal way to my 90-some students than any lecture, march, or money-raising campaign.

I used to think our society was not progressing because great minds were being silenced. Working in education, I now know that our society is regressing because great minds are not being formed. My most rewarding moments as a teacher come from intelligent questions, signs of an attempt at excellence, and honest curiosity. If minds are being formed in truth and logic, the persistent mantras of the negative forces in our society will be proved to be shadows and the people will speak again and challenge the nervous leaders that have listened to Iago's council too long.

Society cannot "progress" without a starting point, and that starting point is the traditions of the past. Too often, our world tries to out do itself creating something novel, but not good, or philosophically intriguing, but not based on reality or human nature as we know it. I once had a professor ask us, "Has all the technology and discoveries of mankind made man better?" The answer is "no." Perhaps we have new ways of understanding the world and interacting with it, but man has the same ability to find true happiness that he has always had. True joy is found in simple things . . . a loving way of interacting with others, intellectual curiosity, the discovery of unchanging truths on which to found your life, and God.

[The above is a bit rambly, but I'll publish it anyhow.]

Whining Their Way Through the Culture War

The amazing thing about a completely biased media is that it reaches a point where reason, convincing arguments, and logic are all unnecessary. It repeats its glittering generalities and mantras enough times, and people stop thinking for themselves. As Dostoevsky so aptly phrased, "We like getting by on other people’s reason--we’ve acquired a taste for it!"

On the flip side, whenever a political or religious leader, celebrity, or a group of independent thinkers comes along with ideas that contradict or question the mantras we've all been trained to parrot, the media responds with horror and disgust.

A sadly poignant example is Pope Benedict's recent trip to Africa. While there, he condemned the racial and political movements that have oppressed freedom. He called Africa the land of hope and praised them for their religious fervor in a largely apathetic world. He also mentioned that abstinence was a more effective AIDs prevention tool than any number of responsibility-erasing condoms . . . and then there was wailing and gnashing of journalistic teeth.

When will they learn to address issues instead of generically crying "corrupter of the youth!," as the sophist Athenians did thousands of years ago to Socrates? When will people refuse to let these modern sophists rhetorically beg the question by whining about someone's audacity to contradict research we "all know" to be indubitably true? No longer can the rational members of society stand by while these media monologuers whine their way through the battles of the culture war. Those who dare to contradict the "p.c." voices need to do so with good arguments, statistics, and prayer.

Thank the Lord that we have a true leader in Pope Benedict, who seeks out ways to encourage nations to better themselves in areas of character as well as in the realms of physical and economic health. And if we ever get the guts to speak out, he may not stand alone; then, our country may again be the land of the free, instead of the land of the nodding couch-potatoes.

http://www.catholicculture.org/commentary/articles.cfm?id=309